Relief

I always seem to want relief from wherever I am. When I was out of school, I just wanted a change of scenery. I wanted to go to Europe, or to wherever. Now that I'm back in school, I want a break. Even lame unemployment sounds nice for a moment, until I remember that that's what my brothers are doing, and they really aren't inspiring role models. They're living the lack of life that all three of us dreamed of before I grew up a little bit and learned that there's more.

So maybe life is just a world of seeking relief. Finding the tendrils of good that creep up from the meshwork of bad and mundane that cover our lives, and making those tendrils everything.

Then again, I love what I'm learning. I just hate that I'm currently failing. I know I can learn everything I need to before the semester ends, and do so well enough that I should pass every test. But can I actually show that on exams? Who knows?

My thoughts have been less clean lately. Too many pretty girls who don't use their smarts that are text-flirting with me. Fine, maybe only one. It's apparently kind of against the grain for me to either want the right girl, the woman that God has for me, or to have no one. I don't believe in divorce. I think my parents were fools to have that. I don't plan to make the same mistake.

Anyway, this is my third cup of wonderful drink that I've earned after studying all day, so peace and war out.