Since last post... well, I finished my OB/GYN rotation the other day. It was relieving to be done.
I met up with a girl for drinks at a brewery after we connected through a dating app. She was pleasant company, but did not seem pleased at the revelation that I am not really looking to date, since dating is more serious for me.
I matched with a girl on tinder who is actually in Colombia. Oddly enough, we have kept up our conversations. She is extremely attractive, but skipped right past when I mentioned God, but I will likely venture toward having a lil' crush on her for now. By the way folks, that is progress. I am once again normalizing to my own brand of normal in which I have distance crushes.
Though I had to deal with those previous issues, I may still have some feelings that I have been suppressing. Maybe I need to let those out tonight, let myself feel before my next rotation starts.
I read the book of Lamentations the other day. It is presumably written by our dear depressed prophetic friend, Jeremiah, and despite its title, it has a more inspiring passage than perhaps any found in the book named after him. This passage is about the fall of Jerusalem, and, in the midst of seeing the desolation of that city, which to many represented something of a metaphor for God's presence, the author found it pertinent to write this.
"I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, 'The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!' The Lord is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him. So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the Lord. And it is good for people to submit at an early age to the yoke of his discipline." Lamentations 3:20-27 NLT.
In the midst of watching his current world crumble, he still specifically decides to hope as he is reminded of God's unfailing love. But another striking aspect to me was that last sentence, where the author says that it is good for people to submit at an early age to the yoke of his discipline. I have often thought that my early submission feels dumb. Life so far has felt like training for a day that will never come.
Since nationalism and Christian culture are so unfortunately politically entwined these days, encouraging words like those above seem to fall short. I seem unable to articulate further... perhaps this is what the exile felt like.
