Just turned 26 today. It's the last portion of my mid-twenties. Last year, the internet went out around 12:02 AM on my birthday and did not turn back on for another day or two, so this birthday has been a step up (the island can make drinking alone in my room with internet into an improvement).
When I turned 25, I had spent a year traveling to Europe and then to med school in the Caribbean. I had discovered what real depression feels like, and the intense failure that brought it on. My worldviews were shaken considerably as I daily interacted with cultures vastly different from my own.
Comparatively, this past year has had little travel. The U.S. presidential election campaigns have revealed a darker side of America and I have felt forced to very specifically define my beliefs and the reasons for them. It has been a year of redefining my beliefs especially with regard to both current events and my readings of the Bible (specifically the Old Testament). These, combined with the legal and ethical issues that are frequently addressed in medical school, have pressured me to reevaluate most of my thinking.
But because my beliefs have been shaken and reshaped, I am starting to feel like this may be the me that I will settle on. I think it's the most informed and thought out version of me that has yet existed. And if I remember correctly from my intro to psych class in my first semester in college, I'm close to the age at which my personality becomes more permanent.
The world is changing. I feel too old and too young, and so does everything around me. How does one deal with this life of contrast? Perhaps a drink will soothe this aching soul.
