Pre-Revolt

About my last blog... I was surprised in the way that God fixed my problem. I was on my way to Revolt, having just picked up Chipotle, and about ten away, after being unable to get rid of those thoughts and things, it left. It's as if something was lifted from off me. I think I may have had an evil spirit on me (after all, I was holding bitterness for quite awhile and couldn't seem to shake it off), and I think God took it off of me right before going. I had been unable to be excited for the retreat at all, just mulling over the past, and suddenly I was able.

I've got more coming, but I'm pretty dern tired, so I'll try to finish in a couple hours (or earlier or later...)

The Past

The Past keeps occupying my thoughts. Regretfully. This needs to be fixed before Revolt!

Here's another. Tell me which ones you DON'T like too. I'd like more than my family's input. I can potentially have two per category in the categories of computer-messed-with, color, and black-and-white.

TAPPS Competition

Our school is hosting a competition called TAPPS. It has district and state meets. I made it to state last year. I'm hoping to do it again. You can help. Tell me what's good. (Help me decide which African one, if any, I should use)

As an update from the last post, my mom had talked to Denise Howard about the small group, 'cause Molly Howard was excited to tell Pastor Brad that we were learning about "spiritual gifts like teleportation". I laughed out loud when I heard that. I may need to clarify a few things there.

Supernatural Expectations

Shayna was sick for small groups tonight. This, however, did not manage to stop it from being successful. Tonight, I did sort of an intro on spiritual gifts. I was kinda all over the place, but I managed to stay on enough of a track to hold attention. I read Paul's whole explanation of spiritual gifts (I Corinthians 12:1-something), and then talked about how there were superpowers all throughout the Bible, like teleportation, super-strength, etc. "Teleportation?" one asked. And I turned to that passage and suddenly the group was enraptured. It was pretty amazing to find that everyone, particularly the guys, were as excited as I am about this topic. Expectations are high.

'Cause how many of us wish that they had known about angels, demons, supernatural powers, and all the other fun parts of Christianity back when we were in junior high?

Faith...Good Stuff

This past weekend, I relaxed. That's basically what happened. I also made a lot of progress with my One. Her best friend left her at the Dart rail and was a jerk to her, and this somehow got her back to God. I think she's gonna be committed.

Tonight, we had a YFN weekend squeezed into a night, complete with Pastor Jaycee and Regeneration. High expectations? Always. Trish cut my hair before service, 'cause we both hate my rat-tail. She did awesome. Props to her.

I'm gonna just spill a few things God told me. First off, in my Bible reading beforehand, I was in Luke 4:32+36. It talked about how Jesus was teaching at the temple. It says twice that "the people were amazed at his teaching". "Why?" thought I. To start with, they were amazed because He spoke with authority. He knew His capabilities, 'cause He had been filled with the Holy Spirit. In verse 36, the people are amazed again. This time, it's after He casts out a demon. His teachings are now amazing not only 'cause of His authority, but because He's got power to back it up.

I went for the alter call to have my faith-to-faith-to-faith strengthened, 'cause I was at the point that I didn't believe I would get accepted into any university, or that the things I had been obeying God with were gonna really have His ideal end result. I had a huge amount of doubt 'cause of Boston University, 'cause I had spoken it out in faith and felt like God had told me to go there. Then that whole deal fell through, my desire to go there with it. I was afraid to have faith that I would be accepted anywhere, lest I have a similar let-down happen again. But then God reminded me of something Pastor Benny Perez said. It's better to have faith in something and go down believing than to be doubting or uncertain about it. I think it's true. So I have faith that I'm going to UT.

During worship, I started thinking of an equation in Physics (don't worry, it relates). Energy is the ability to do work. Work requires displacement, or moving something to a new location. Power is a combination of all of these. It's the rate at which work happens. So, when Jesus worked in power, and when we work in power, it's energy causing a movement really quickly. When the apostles did deeds of power in Acts, their numbers grew by thousands. You know why? 'Cause the power of Jesus is a huge amount of energy moving hearts, minds, bodies, and spirits. It's science.

He also wants me to rewrite the angry letter I had written to Mr. Harber, apologizing for holding bitterness towards him, and making my points in a more kindly manner.

Senior Thesis

(This is at an unreasonable hour. I don't know why I took the picture)

Guess who finished? Me, that's who. It took most of the night and a school day, but I emailed it and got it all squared away.

Notes

Tyler didn't start his paper off well.

Half the notes for my senior thesis disappeared. The better half. Avoiding panic is a toughy.

I'm glad I underlined in the book. But I still have a LOT of notes to make up.

Toilet Time

I went and sat on the pot for a lil' bit, and my life found relief. Jesus delivered me.

GAP

...But God still answers prayers... "The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." -James 5:16

Bad Day

I had a bad day. Doesn't that stink? It took forever to get my transcript, then I spent like an hour trying to get it sent out, which led to my being late to church (that's past 4:45 to me) Everyone I talked to about it said what wisdom/God(maybe) told me. It's still terribly hard to take the news that I'm out of the running for valedictorian. And that I worked for like three hours getting the transcript that displayed my atrocious second-rate grade.

I can't afford to get upset with God, not when I'm leading a small group. I've got to work it out civilly.

It's just hard to take. But I'm supposed to be trying to have my heart and motives be modeled after God's. God doesn't care about grades except as a means to get me further. If I wanna grow, I've gotta look at what God wants to teach me through it.

It's just a lil' tough when you think that God called you to a place, and you don't get accepted, and God redirects you. And you don't think you'll get into where you think God might be leading you, so you stop believing you'll get into any college at all.

Deadline week continues...

Sleep

Strap a motor on this, and it'll be a Segway.

I've been sleeping all day long after school. If I wasn't so good at sleeping, I would be worried about not having enough REM time. Since I'm flippin' awesome at sleeping, it's no problem. But really, it's a huge problem. How to solve it? Make it to Friday.

Deadline Week

I forgot to mention; this is deadline week. What does that mean? Everything is due: College applications, the first draft of our senior thesi (plural), a project for Physics, etc.

I also forgot to mention, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

The Sunglass Challenge

Katie and I, being the most competitive people we know, have undertaken a challenge. First, the challenge was to buy the same type of sunglasses. Piece of cake. Next, make a picture of you wearing them into a profile pic on Facebook. Too much for you? After that, take a picture with the glasses on, golden sunbursts exploding from behind, and an intense expression. BAM! Shot that one down.

What further challenges involving these sunglasses could we possibly come up with?

The Incredibles

To recap yesterday's events, I stayed at home and worked on my thesis for most of the day, then my computer remembered it's viruses, which frustrates me enough to distract me. Only 4 pages into it.

Today, I talked to Shayna about the plan for small groups, and she agreed that spiritual gifts was the way to go. Of course, an hour before small groups started, she suggested that we make it a movie night tonight, since we wouldn't have many people, and I agreed. We watched The Incredibles, and, although no one else may have been thinking this, I thought it tied in well with the lesson plan.

Superpowers? God dishes 'em out. Loads of 'em are mentioned all through the Bible. Teleportation, super-strength, flying, etc. It's all there.

I just wanna share this stuff that gets me so excited, so that maybe some of these junior highers will be crazy enough to believe that God's Word really can and just might be reality today, in all aspects, including the fun parts.

Abandoned Couch

Talk about fun! After sleeping through most of the day yesterday, I trooped off to meet Cassie, who would give me a ride to Angela's birthday party. After missing the street a few times, we made it to the house. Since it was mostly Paradigm leadership there, it was a grand ol' time. I kicked rear at Guitar Hero, more for my style than for my score, then we started up some Taboo. Holy crap, that game can cause division in the ministry. Shayna, Shadow, and Alan get SOOOOO competitive, it was hilarious. I made one joke in the middle of it, and Caleb gave me a "that's not appropriate" look. After this, I went for a walk with Trish and Cassie, and we ended up sitting on a couch labeled "free" for awhile. It was quite a talk, mostly talking about relationships and such 'cause Cassie's first question to me tends to be, "So, who do you have a crush on?" It was refreshing, 'cause Cassie had disappeared from anything social for months. Good quality time was had, and that's what gets me the most.

Abandoned couches always seem like prime locations for good conversations.

Just The Beginning

Just to give a little update, I told Rush what God wants, and he said that I was like the third person to tell him this week, so he's starting to get the message. And that money I gave away happened to be the perfect timing, after the recipient had a flat tire, then their car dying, and various other things to contribute to a bad day. They were almost to the point of tears over the phone. If I continue to let God have His way, this is just the beginning.

No Spiel Spewing

I forgot to mention in my last blog what reminded me of the God-living. I was hangin' with Cameron and Katie (and Michelle a lil' bit) last night, and the entire night, when I said something stupid, I couldn't get it out of my head. I couldn't stop thinking about it afterwards and beating myself up for it. It's been FOREVER since I've had this problem, so I was wondering why on earth it was coming back. Then I realized it. I was being self-conscious of all my words 'cause I need to be watching what I say now, 'cause God may give me Words, and I need to be conscious of what I'm saying so I don't spew a spiel instead of what He wants. When He's on your mind all the time, you're bound to be saying what He would want you to say.

On The Horizon

I felt like God said that I'd be able to live in that awesome way that I've been yearning to. He said this coming semester was the time for it. The difference now will be that I'll keep in mind the value of balance. During my time in Canton, I had lots of time to sit around praying, texting and selling (didn't sell much). Things came together. Here are a few things on the horizon for me/us:

1. Generally speaking, I'm stepping it up in leadership. I stepped back this past semester to let other people step up. To be specific, Rush and Perez didn't. Rush would be the main problem there. He's the one with the friggin' huge anointing for leadership. So yeah, when the ones that God wants don't step up, those less-abled among us have to do so. This is how Jordan and I end up leading. Not to downplay my or Jordan's abilities, of course. I just felt like God is having us take the place of someone who decided not to step up when God wanted them to.

2. New Paradigm. I'll be talking to Pastor Nick about videos for the New Paradigm tomorrow. One such new video may be a new, improved version of the I Am Paradigms. Pastor Nick originally intended for them to be a fresh word caught on video. I've got an idea for the first fresh word (it's based on the blog about Solla Sollew by Dr. Seuss).

3. Revolt, the school retreat coming up at the end of January. Jordan said he needed someone organized to help out with it. Guess who was waiting for someone else to step up to the plate? Yep, so now that it's a month away, I'm taking over much of the planning. I texted Cameron, and he confirmed that Mike Bond will most likely want to be a part of this, so there's our speaker. Awesome? I think so.

4. I get to give most of my/God's Christmas money away (the money I was gonna be living on for awhile or, if I saved it, gambling with on the cruise). I love having to rely on God financially. Don't worry; His orders, not mine.

5. God revealed something to me through my Dr. Seuss research. Dr. Seuss wrote his books for adults, but written in language simple enough for children to understand (in many of his first drafts, he cussed and swore a lot). When asked if he would ever write adult books instead of childrens, he replied that he didn't know of a difference between the two. This plus a sermon I was listening to clued me in on something. I've been uncertain of whether to approach the subject of awesome supernatural stuff with my small group, 'cause I wasn't sure if it'd be the appropriate group. But it's a subject I ALWAYS wanna talk about, like something rising up in me. So maybe, just maybe, if it's done simply, we can start talking about my favorite parts of Christianity.

I'm excited.