A Brief Look Back At 2014

I should have done a year in review post like I always do, but med school is busy. I'm having a hard time getting back into the swing of it.

2014 was an amazing year. I was mostly sad and lonely for its duration, but I also learned what I was hoping to learn through it. I worked as a medical assistant for a neurology clinic and quit on very good terms with very good timing (and was invited to the Christmas party last month). I went on a cruise with family and then went on a mission trip to Belarus. From there, I visited 12 other countries when I backpacked across Europe (and technically to Asia in Turkey) for three months. I learned so much about myself and the world around me.

One big lesson I learned that I'm still trying to apply is that I need to learn my theology better. I never used to bother with a lot of the tough questions, mostly 'cause I had come to an understanding that I was fine with, and that was it for me. But I learned in Europe and elsewhere since that I'm not learning it for me; I'm learning theology for the people I meet. And I'm learning it well so that I can share it even when we've all had a few pints.

That brings me to another point. The dishonest conservative southern Christian outlook of pretending that we don't drink alcohol is stupid. I'm really beginning to hate it. In Europe, I had to explain it, and it made explaining Christianity itself that much more complicated. It doesn't have to be. To put it simply, passages in the Bible explain that overindulgence is generally something to avoid, but it's good to follow the Spirit and the God-given convictions you have over it. For those in church leadership, the rules are a little more strict. And you also don't drink if a Christian around you will think sinning is okay by your actions of drinking. So maybe it is a little complicated.

A term I used while traveling was "confronting people with their humanity", which is a fancy way of saying that I would try to reach an honest side of people when I spoke to them, because traveling taught me that people are people, and generally good, if you can reach that part of them. Sometimes you can't, but often you can. And it's easier to reach it if you yourself throw down an initial wave of open kindness.

After backpacking through Europe, I had three months of very little, just being lazy before med school. Then I started med school. I also started living in a developing country. I stayed in Rawlins dorms at Medical University of the Americas, which just so happen to be awful dorms to stay in. Because you generally have a roommate in those dorms (or it's more expensive), it was very difficult for me. I was paired with the most culturally different person attending this school. He was fine with me but I had a lot of problems with him, most of which he never knew about because I am very passive aggressive. But it was difficult living there. The "bus" (van) situation was difficult too. They didn't follow schedules, so I wasted many hours in the process of waiting for the buses. Hours I could have been doing anything else. I also picked up bad study habits from my roommate. He was able to understand and memorize things when he first heard them in class, so he watched tv shows a LOT; I require prereading and post-reading and lots and lots of reading, and I still only do so-so. But I also watched shows more than I should have, and I continue to have difficulty dropping the habit now.

I spent half of last year out of the United States, and will spend most of this year out of the States. The U.S. is beautiful. I'm convinced that to become a real patriot, you have to leave the country. That's how you appreciate something.

I'm feeling better about my current situation. I  have some friends and my room is comfortable. Strangely though, I feel like I've toned myself down quite a bit here. I don't act starved for attention nearly as much as I did in college. I don't know how much of it was the new culture or people or that I'm in school or if it's just another one of those chances to "reinvent" myself. I also don't know if I like it. I still go to the school parties and beat the locals in dance battles, but it all seems different. Maybe it's because there really isn't as much chance to be noticed here. No talent shows, no lip-syncing competitions, none of that is here. Just people getting drunk at parties and karaoke if I can get to it.