Being A Jerk

The homeless and the gypsies were an ever-present part of daily life in Paris and in most of the rest of Europe. During past trips, I gave a significant amount of money to those. After all, these are people in need, and isn't it Biblical to give to these?

But I found that this wasn't always necessarily the case. I've worked with homeless ministries in Dallas and Los Angeles, and have discovered that most major cities, along with a great many smaller ones, have programs designed to solve the problem of homelessness. These are organized so as to promote more healthy living, with an ending goal of actually getting people off the streets to live productive lives.

My first night in Dublin, I was waiting for my bus at the station. I would be headed to Dundalk that night to stay with a host family. A homeless man came up to me asking for money. I gave him something in the realm of two pounds, about $4. Rather than stop there, he pressed me for more money. I told him that it was all I had to spare, that I really wasn't being wise by sparing that much. He continued to make casual conversation, then pressed for money again, emphasizing that he didn't have a place to sleep that night, but could afford one with ten pounds. I was impressed by this and asked where this was, because I would gladly sleep in a place for such a price. He skirted this and pressed me for money again. I very firmly told him this time that I had already given him all I would, and that he was being rude. As the time for my bus ride drew closer, I asked this same homeless man if he could help me figure out where my bus would be, and he wouldn't even speak to me once he realized that I wasn't giving him any more money.

In Paris, gypsies would walk up to you, asking you if you spoke English. Your initial reaction is to be excited that someone with an un-American accent is speaking to you. Culture! But no, the reason they are speaking with you is because they want to rob you or get something from you somehow. Very rarely do people in Paris approach you out of sheer kindness. You learn to avoid even making eye contact, putting on a serious face and waving them away when they try to speak to you. You don't even give them the time of day because that's the only way to keep them from targeting you.

I learned from this experience that sometimes you really sometimes just plain have to be a jerk to these seemingly less fortunate. You are nothing but a dollar sign to them and when you don't have the dollar signs to spare, when you are most likely hungrier than they currently are, you have to be a jerk. They aren't privileged enough to have your attention.