Back in Texas

Living the dream. Flew into Dallas and days later, was wearing a green screen suit for a feature film. All of the actors can act, the DP knows what he is doing, and a longtime producer friend is consulting. My part was mostly contortionist stuff casting shadows, so I was in compression shorts being creepy, and it was reportedly impressive. The best part about this role is that it is all blocking, so I do not need to memorize lines. The fact that I give notes on the script is just a bonus that I bring to the table.

Then after that night shoot, I got an email from my writer/director friend with the script for a short film we plan to shoot at the end of the month. I read it once and gave my notes, which were incorporated into the script. He noted that the last film we shot was much better from my pitches, one of which was a quick final line.

Another writer/director, whose pilot script I had already read and given notes on, said that he had effectively changed the second half of it based on my notes, and he wrote in an acting role for me.

The clock is ticking for this standup show in a week and a half. I really want to make myself finish writing and then perform a particular standup set that would show off my contortionist skills in a bit of a Robin Williams-esque manner. I want to do this in part because it is a longer set, and if I can get it good and tight, it should really set me apart at festivals.

After years of hair stylists asking if I dyed my hair, and then them letting me know that I have gray hair (as if I had not noticed that trend starting a decade ago), I finally dyed my hair black last night. Well, I dyed the roots, so there are still long gray strays intermixed. It cost five dollars and like half an hour to fix this insecurity.

New Feature Idea

I thought of what may be a groundbreaking feature film idea. Instead of bending genres, stacking them. Historically, movies like Airplane! and Hot Shots are nearly shot-for-shot parodies of other movies, and the sequel to Hot Shots literally has a cameo of Michael Sheen, who stars in the movie being parodied in his scene.

So instead of getting frustrated with my inability to keep jokes out of my writing, what if I had a place for those jokes, and created context? In the first 45 minutes, we have a sci fi horror thriller. Alien comes down and terrorizes a couple during their weekend getaway. Relationship issues, violence, thoughtful difficulties. Things go sour, end on an exterior drone shot going from first floor to second, and a comedic parody of the same movie begins, maybe with one of the earlier characters from the opening shots singing a lighthearted Disney-esque song. What had been inanimate objects in the first half are now puppets that sing along, react to the scary parts, and maybe become emboldened heroes by the end of the second half.

This... this could be very good, I think. I have already written an outline for the serious version. It will need to be modified, but then it is just writing a joke version of that one.

With the prospect of potentially going to comedy festivals with industry networking events, I need to have pitches ready. For a tv show pilot, I was thinking of a comedic variety education show similar to what I do on my podcast, though I do already have an animated cartoon pilot script written (but it is currently too short). This idea would give me a feature to pitch. as well.

If I got to do a festival and meet industry people, some other homework for that would be to learn what each studio is doing or has done lately, and be able to pull comps from their stuff depending on who I am addressing.

The latest news indicates that when I get back to LA, union strikes will have begun anew, but after that ends, the industry should pick up again. I have also seen on twitter that writer's rooms are staffing, just with fewer jobs out there, which to me indicates that things will pick up in the fall and winter.

Ten Days from Dallas

Of course I go to LA and then get cast in a horror feature in Dallas. And probably a short, along with a standup show. And also the writer/director I worked with for a pilot last year of course sends me two pilot scripts, and of course I have notes on them that he thinks are good, and potentially wants to bring me on with credits and compensation. I guess as a producer? Or consultant? Who knows.

I have finally figured out how to streamline podcast recording in a car. The trick? Print out the stuff I read. I know, rocket science. Literally just walk a couple blocks to a fedex to print out a couple pages, and then I don't have to worry about my laptop running out of batteries (as it did on Monday).

My professional standup comedian friend tells me that my standup footage from a couple months ago is festival worthy. The festival I am interested in needs three minutes, so I asked which three minutes, and she said maybe the first three, but I cannot go wrong. Downside to that is that I have punched up those first three minutes since then. It should be both longer and better now.

I met with an actor who wanted to work with me on a web series to later try to make into a pilot. A big warning sign with him was that he wanted to emphasize loyalty, saying that he wanted to pitch me to a director but I should decline so he keeps the role. This weirded me out, and I instead just asked and found that I cannot work the dates suggested. Then I went to his apartment. He began to read his draft of this comedy idea, and I realized that he is a terrible writer. So I suggested that we focus on the beats of the story (parts of which sound okay), and we stormed some brain. I came up with lots of bits for it that I liked (and which I am pretty confident could play well). Days later, he texted me, saying that he wanted to finish up writing so he could start casting. This is of course another red flag. Good rapid-pace comedy takes time to write. I told him that when I am finished with my current projects, I will try to find a day to get inspired and write a second draft of his script.

I have to be more disciplined. I need to edit and memorize my standup, because I am a few weeks away from doing 15 minutes. I have plenty of material, but I am such a perfectionist about it. Like, I have one bit that I think will be incredible, but it requires choreography and voice acting, in addition to memorizing the text. Gotta do it though.

Also, giving script notes is fun. It feels like some of what I should be doing.

Aged with Structured Comedy

I aged. I am 34 now. I take 40 mg of fluoxetine daily and am living out of my mom's Prius in Los Angeles. I love it.

But enough about all that.

I went to a standup show last night, and the show featured a number of comics, one of whom was Maria Bamford. Incredible comic. Just incredible. The only time that laughter stopped was when she was talking, and when she did a brief crowdwork bit, but she even had a punchline ready for that.

Most of the comics talked about dating and sex. When you have like eight comics in a row, those topics can become boring. Maria Bamford instead talked about her own mental health issues and how she navigates them in the world.

I also listened to The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers podcast, and this week, they talked about some of their older work, and whether having children has influenced whether they prefer their old content to have a different tone. Less adult jokes, etc., and Akiva said that he just disliked when the comedy was otherwise clean, but then had one dirty joke or profanity in it that need not have been there.

These have been good reminders to me to keep my comedy clean, and let the dirty stuff just be exceptions for shows that specifically want more adult humor.

I have learned that the rewrites in standup are boring to do, and I therefore avoid them unless I have a deadline like a show. I had such a deadline a few weeks ago, so I did this act that was very physical. Annoyingly, the video I have of the performance demonstrated to me that although it is very promising, I really mostly figured out blocking. So I need to tighten up all the jokes around the physical bits. It is like choreographing a dance routine, except that I have to talk too. Very annoying.

A downside to the fluoxetine's effects with regard to the decrease in anxiety is that my work ethic is a little compromised. No longer do I lay awake at night, overstimulated thoughts racing, unable to sleep because the brain wants to work. Occasionally, I was able to use that restlessness to figure out jokes. They are fascinating little puzzles that can work if you put in the time with patience, but oh how I lack the patience. This is part of why I like to have so many projects going on at once. But of course, I have a standup show next month, which means that I have another deadline. And the last such show I did, I had fifteen minutes to fill. The last show I did well, I had eight minutes.

I met with a friend who works in branding and is fairly well-connected in the comedy world, and he noted that me having lots of one-liners is a good problem to have. He also pointed out that my comedy sets will need to have a focus on structure. The problem with my being so diversified in my talents and comedic sensibilities is that I have to line them up properly. After I talk about dissecting cadavers, do I say some one-liners about seeing patients? Or about death? Or should I save that for after I do a silly cartoonish one? These questions demand some answers, and it might require multiple adderall-fueled sessions for me to make real progress on them. My supply on that end is unfortunately quite limited.

The Monstrous Palooza

This past weekend, I visited Monsterpalooza. Never have I ever been so welcomed simply for being who I physically am as a person. I spoke to so many prosthetic makeup artists, introducing myself as a contortionist who wanted to model, and nearly all of them very quickly wanted to exchange information. One in particular was in charge of the directory for a makeup school and said that they literally have only two other contortionists listed, so I will genuinely be in demand.

With the recent success of the new show Fallout, which involves a lot of prosthetic work, the timing might be extremely fortuitous. Just seem like excellent prospects.

The writer/director I worked with on that pilot last year has sent me two pilot scripts, with the promise of a third one on the way. He wanted to hear my thoughts and to know if there were any parts I could see myself playing. And another filmmaker friend, who produced the award-winning short film I made 20 years ago, reached out to gauge my interest in playing a shadow creature in a feature film in Texas this summer, mostly in July. Additionally, the writer/director who I very much enjoy working with has talked up doing another short film this summer, so hopefully I can manage it so I can fly in and knock all the projects out in the same timespan.

Feeling hopeful and excited that I am where I want to be in my birthday week.

Signed

I did a standup show last month that felt like what I had set out to write two years ago. I sent the footage to my old manager from child actor days, and he signed me last week. Well, technically just added me on Actors Access and confirmed all of my details so he could shop me around. But he started talking about doctor hosting work that would pay $125k a year, which would be amazing, though in the moment, all I could think of was if they tried to get me to push ethically unsound drugs or vitamins. But obviously, making six figures as a celebrity doctor host is literally a job that I tried to search for a couple years ago. It would be a dream day job while I try to work up some tv and movie deals.

I did another show this past Thursday and reviewed that footage a couple days ago, which is exciting, because I spent many hours that day writing and rewriting the set. So now I know that I can be kinda decent with new standup even on short notice. Lots of room to improve, but I am worlds better than most any open mic comic.

Living in My Mom's Car & Loving It

I was staying in the spare bedroom of a couple for two months, but that ended, and I have been back to car. And if I am honest, I really like it. I finally caved and ordered a zoom recorder, so I should now be able to record the podcast in the car now.

Since I last updated... I went to an open casting call for Big Brother, but I have not heard back, so no bets there. Then I took a tour of a prop studio thanks to a connection via the online writer's group I meet with, and that helped introduce me to a guy there who used to work in prosthetics. He tells me that I should be able to get a foot in the door for creature work by reaching out to studios, and also by attending Monsterpalooza at the end of May. I had planned to just drive home since although I adore LA, I was beginning to feel like I was no longer doing much of use here. But my mom and sister are going on vacation for a month, and I am now flying rather than driving, so that I can get back in time for Monsterpalooza. Today, I emailed the various effects studios with my photo, resume, and some videos displaying my contortionist skills. Hopefully something will come from it! Regardless, that prosthetics friend said he would introduce me to folks at Monsterpalooza.

I did an improv show, which was very fun, with an open invitation to come back. I also did my standup variety act in a way that was close to how I imagined it could be when I first started writing, so I am excited to get that footage and write more. A couple days after I get back from LA, I will have stage time to work on said variety act via the host of that improv show in another show he is starting. Oh, and I told him that I would be interested in his X-Men improv show that he is starting back up after many years.

I just visited a dear friend up in San Francisco this past weekend. She always wanted children, and through IVF, she is now pregnant with the child of her boyfriend. Among other things, she, her friends, and I talked about where I am in life with romance and acting. The good friend said that my faith was such a driving force behind my becoming a doctor, and wondered how I felt about it now that I am less faith-focused and no longer trying to practice medicine. I feel that if I had gotten back into acting just before or after college, I would have potentially become famous and successful, but also a worse person. Now I feel that I am poor but a much better person than I might have been. Additionally, when I was first asking God to speak to me, the leadership at church told me "just wait" and "be patient," which was followed months later by a prophet telling me that I would become a medical doctor. Now, my old manager from child actor days is echoing those same sentiments of "just wait" and "be patient," and somehow it feels familiar and hopeful. Those friends also asked me about dating, and I said that I am happy to stay single now, that for various reasons including my own empathy and how my brain obsesses when I am in a relationship, I do not want that for myself. This was my honest take, but then my dreams that night were of me in despair and unable to process what I was going through. And then last night, the dreams were of flirting with cute girls. So perhaps my subconscious does not like my current contentment with leaving romance behind.