Having someone like you in return is weird. It seems treacherous. I have not asked God about her because I am moving in a week. She is also in the midst of making life changes to become a better human and Christian, as am I, but if I was a betting man, I would not expect God to give the green light for us as each of us are now. No matter how much of a delight that would be. Maybe I should write out all the things I like about her. Maybe I will start writing letters. Well, perhaps I should not. She will likely find someone else while I am gone.
I have been researching apartments in Houston. On the advice of a friend's friend who lived there, I am probably going to be paying twice as much as I have ever paid for an apartment due to the need to avoid bad neighborhoods. A thousand dollars per month seems crazy, but on the bright side, each one looks like a hotel room at a resort. The resort style pools, fitness centers, and game rooms are not hurting anything either.
In other news, it turns out that I have been leading someone on for a long while. I have rules for a reason, but I dance around them. Though I feel as if I made myself clear on how I go about the dating process, flirting is not harmless. It resulted in confusion. So that is a good reason to be moving. I apologized and threw the blame on myself because that is easier than placing it on anyone else. I get the feeling that I am better than most people when it comes to writing out my issues in order to process them. I can deal with things better than most, so I will take on the burden when I can. Because once I get it figured out with God, it is no longer my burden. Anyway, I spent much of today feeling terrible about how I had made her feel.
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