Actually Believing

In the time during which I was studying for these last exams, I had a talk with God. Well, I had many talks, but there was one pertinent to this blog. I admitted to God that when I had preached in other countries about how God does the impossible, I didn't include my own story in the sermon. It wasn't because I thought it was difficult to relate to or some other, good reason. I didn't include my own story because I didn't really believe it. At the time, I wasn't a good student. God hadn't made the necessary changes in me. All I had to go on was faith, and I only had faith to stay the course, not enough to join in the illustration.

But as God told me when He first got me hooked on that passage of Abraham having a son (in 2010, I think), He wants me to be the illustration for it.

So I failed these tests. Badly enough that I need to become a significantly better student if I hope to avoid repeating classes. And I hope that very much. Because, among the multitude of other reasons, I don't want to stay on this island for an extra semester, nor do I want potential clinical and residency spots to go to someone else who did not have to repeat or withdraw from a class.

So here's to actually believing that God will do as He says. Against all hope, Abraham believed, and so became the father of many nations. So I too believe against all hope, all possibility, in the dream that God has given me, that of being a doctor and being the difference that I want to see in the world.