Treasure Moments

After many delays, I have signed an NDA that now prohibits me from disclosing anything about the project, including the schedule. My car has been in the shop for a week, and will probably be in that situation for awhile longer because the hybrid battery likely needs to be replaced. The bright side is of course that after these repairs, I will not necessarily have to worry about the car dying on me at any given moment.

Another consequence of having no car is that I have not been driving to the gym nor to the coffee shop. I am unfortunately sensing a strong correlation between my motivation and inspiration to write and my time in said coffee shop. I have tried to work in the local grocery store cafe area (my current location), but my brain just is not on board. I am trying a new strategy today though. The seating is a little too low for convenient typing, so I brought a cushion. Will brilliance now flow readily? Not betting on it, but we will have to see.

From what I recently read about pilots, networks do not greenlight a series until like July. And even if they do pick up the series, they can replace cast members depending on a number of factors. So instead of thinking about how, if this works out, I will be able to make a living and make all of my short-term dreams come true, I need to just focus on the work and on enjoying the fact that I will get to be on set. That is a privilege that I thought I had given up and walked away from. Treasure every moment and let that be enough for now.

A More Defined Delay

Well, it turns out that the pilot was delayed. I was waiting every day to hear about it, to get a script so I could start getting to work, and then I learned halfway through the days that they had me block off that we would not shoot for another two weeks. I missed a lot of opportunities in these two weeks. Because I was hyped up and on edge for that time, I have found myself to be depressed, with symptoms that I have not had since before I decided to get back into acting.

This pilot could get picked up and be my chance to make a living. Or it could have booked up most of pilot season without much beyond some reel footage and the $100 per day that they will pay me. The fortunate thing is that they did finally send me papers to sign. So now at least I know that I will get paid (unlike the last time I worked for them).

After this pilot, I think it will be time for me to perform standup again. to get used to being on stage with these jokes. And because that can potentially pay some bills going forward. Not to mention that if it's a good quality recording, I can submit it to comedy festivals...

There is also that pilot that I am writing. The standup workshop fortunately has me churning out jokes that are a poor fit for standup, but seem to be a great fit for certain little spots in the pilot. So hopefully I will get it finished in a more organized fashion with the comedic blanks filled in after I complete this second draft.

Delays & Waiting

The wait is killing me. We were supposed to start filming the pilot this past Monday, but the winter storm last week delayed production by a couple days. So by my count, that means that production was meant to start on Wednesday. Too bad it is already Saturday. I just want a script so I can obsess over it!

The bright side to production delays was that I got to see my somewhat famous standup comedian friend perform again when she was in town on Sunday night. She let me know that my stuff was good enough to be paid to perform and work out the little missing details on stage. I made excuses that included a desire to sell my one-liners, since I seem to have a knack for writing them, but in truth, I have read so much online about how it takes ten years to have decent traction when it comes to doing standup. But that is for normal humans, which is a group into which I do not fall. But then I watched Steve Martin's 1976 set at The Troubadour last night, and it made me want to do more physical humor, much of which one tends to figure out on stage in the moment through improvisation.

Then that same standup friend released her first standup special online, then was written up in the New York Times about it along with a show that was my most recently binged comedy obsession. I was so excited for my friend, but also kicking myself a little too.

The restive anxiety was really hitting me yesterday. It feels like I have been sitting on my hands for two weeks, just waiting to be able to work on this pilot. Last I heard was on Thursday, when the creator said that she would be sending forms to sign, and once I signed them, she would send me a script.

My frustration over sitting and waiting in the midst of the success of friends is getting to me a little bit, but I am trying to channel that frustration into writing more. And so far, it is working. Over the past week, I have finally written jokes that incorporate my contortionist skills. I do not know if they are any good, but maybe they are!

Sick in a Storm

I caught another cold, so I have spent this meantime just recovering from that. Then we had a winter storm come along, so those were a few days of not working out or getting out to write. And since I have been churning out these short standalone jokes pretty consistently, I have felt the loss. But the bright side is that I have spent time refining the jokes I already had, and most of them are now ready to perform. Perform when? At what venue? Well, when the opportunity comes knocking, I hope to have my prepared material smashing through that door in response.

During this sickly time, I had the opportunity to audition to be on a singing show. It would have filmed in Ireland at the end of March, and I would have had a chance for a million dollar prize. But it would have also required me to sign a contract saying that I would not appear on network television in any other capacity for a year. I asked the creator of this show that we are about to film whether that could be an issue, and she said that by the fall, she expects us to be on cable, possibly network television. So I turned down the audition.

And then I read about how much I could expect to get paid for such a role. With one episode as a lead (which I am), I could potentially make a year's worth of minimum wage. If we actually make a full season, that could pay better than any of the medical jobs to which I had applied last year. And unlike those jobs, this one is likely to regularly challenge my skills as an improviser. I know this because at our last shoot, the show's creator told my scene partner to improvise, whereas I had specific information from the script that I needed to convey, so I had to guide the conversation and keep up with the changes.

A Weekend of Wondrous News

Big things happened over the weekend. For one thing, the dramatic role I had been playing as a corrupt police chief went from shooting low production value short clips to now planning to shoot a 60-minute pilot in two weeks. It sounded like the SXSW plans might be out, but booking a lead role in a pilot is obviously a better gig anyway.

And then the following day, I played a significant role in the pilot for a workplace comedy, which basically functioned as the first major scene to set the tone for the show. And everyone was blown away. This was the zaniest character that I have been given to play, and I absolutely loved it. I was finally permitted to "over act" which my face and body are always craving. And the writer/director incorporated the jokes that I pitched. And the physical bits were so good that our part at least should be somewhat enjoyable on mute. Afterward, as I was sharing a little of my journey and the reservations I had had about getting back into acting, the PA for the shoot said, "What you did today is a sign that you are making the right choice" which was of course a lovely thing to hear.

With that upcoming dramatic pilot, I have to really get it together. Every production for them so far has involved short notice and then changes once we are on set. I of course practice improvising regularly, but I also want to be as prepared as I can be for a given role. I will consider this to be a chance to prove myself within the industry, which means that for the two weeks of shooting, I will be hardcore focused. Since the writer tends to make typos and those typos distract me, I will need to read digitally first, then correct and reword parts of it, then print it out and make notes for my character.

The Upcoming Season

Oh how the time goes. Last week, I was feeling a little down for not booking anything. This is apparently normal just after the holidays, but still a let down for me. Then out of the blue, a death metal band needed someone to play a killer. After seeing my contortionist dance video, the director cast me for that role, along with another one, all shooting that weekend. Everyone involved was kind, and the pay was pretty good too! And I should have some great shots for my reel when it comes out in June.

I also signed on with an agency. They have a nonexclusive contract, meaning that they do not get to take a cut of my check unless they specifically help me get the job. They were slow on a job today, so I paid up to use the website because it was requesting a contortionist. Only after I submitted did they send an email. Sorry buster!

In the weekly online standup workshop I do, I feel that I am nearly done with two different five-minute sets. But also importantly, I have been blowing away the host with my one-liners. They are apparently the most difficult types of standup to write, but I have been churning them out at a decent rate. They are also very useful for padding a standup set from five minutes to become six or seven, etc. And I realized that Steve Martin's standup was made up primarily of a bunch of that style of joke. Maybe not literally one line, but he had a lot of little standalone jokes.

I also thought of a short film idea. Really just a couple moments in it, and now I am trying to expand those very specific scenes into a larger narrative. My dad texted my mom with reasons to kick me out of her house that are all focused on the fact that I am a financial investment that is no longer focusing on studying medicine. Never mind that he would not listen to the counsel that came from such an education. He also listed all the jobs that I can get with an MD (as if I would not have tried to get those jobs already). The fortunate thing is that this inspired another scene in the pilot that I am writing. I still do not know where to put it, but it is nice to have that kind of material. It is also nice because when my dad similarly advised my mom years ago regarding my oldest brother, she declined his advice, and that relatively worry-free time is when he managed to plant the seeds that would get him rich from crypto. Good omen.

I had a callback today for that audition I did last week. Different parts, but they were all fun. Downside is that I misspoke a couple times in the callback, whereas my auditions were pretty flawless. The writer/director praised how I had a distinctive way of playing each character. I responded by telling him that it was in the writing.

Pilot season is upon us. I have an acting website up as of an hour ago. I have a podcast interview tomorrow, a free modeling session on Saturday, and a comedy shoot on Sunday. And that corrupt chief of police role is supposed to film next week... but it is frustrating because they ask us to block off a week. The last dates they told me to block out, they never followed up about it. Those days came and went. And the videos that they released still look shoddy. Slightly better, but the lighting was bad enough that I did not give it more than a couple seconds of attention. They obviously need a director of photography, a prop master, and the editing obviously needs attention. Lighting too, but that and the lighting might be done by the director of photography. And to be clear, other productions in which I have been involved have looked great, so it is once again just the contrast of appearing like a student film.

First Real Audition

I have had no new gigs this year, but I did have an agency accept me as a client. Others have yet to respond to my submissions after weeks of waiting while this one gave their response on the same day that I sent in my work. A web search revealed little in terms of public opinion, except for one client who could not get their representative to get on a zoom call with them. So I emailed and asked for a zoom call. We will see how that goes.

Today, I had what I think was my first normal audition in at least a decade. It was done online and they just had me read some lines, doing some dialogue with me. I made the project's leader laugh some with the main character, then he had me read for another character, and he was laughing out loud multiple times at my cold read delivery. I may have overacted a little with the main character role, but in my view, I can always tone it down if they need it. In any case, he said auditions will be ongoing for the next ten days, but I should know about callbacks within a couple days. It was a fun experience! I wish I had more auditions like this. This is what I enjoyed in my childhood. The affirmation of the director saying that they liked what I just did, the choices I made (which are all improvised and it makes me worry that I will not be able to recreate it if I am cast), all of it really hits in such a real way. I will assume that I was not cast, but that does not take away from the experience.

I thought of a short film concept today. I need to stop sharing my first draft pitches with friends, because they absolutely do not tend to get what I am saying until I have fleshed it out. And I like to think that I am critical enough of my own writing that by the time I share a finished version of it, it should be decent.